I did it, I did it all by myself!

Thursday evening, December 28, 2006, I was ready to have my third baby. When I went to bed that night, I made peace that it was the end of my pregnancy. When I awoke on Friday morning, I had irregular labor hugs that started 12 minutes apart and later went to 18 minutes apart. I thought it was practice labor, because I'd been having it so often in the weeks before; I thought it would go away and we'd wait some more. Friday evening, my husband and I took our two sons shopping, and the hugs began coming about every 7 minutes. I realized they were asking for my attention so I told my husband, “These are early labor hugs.” We still had a list of things to get elsewhere, so he ran into the store to get them while I waited in the car with the kids. 7:15pm While waiting for him to come out, I called my midwife to tell her what was happening. She asked me what my activity level was like, and I said I had gone shopping. She advised me to go home and rest and let her know later what was happening, so we went home. 7:45pm We arrived home. My husband fed the boys and put them to bed. 8:15pm I rested in bed with some of my homemade chicken noodle soup and called my midwife and mom. My midwife asked me what my gut feeling was. I said the hugs were demanding my attention and I thought baby was going to come, though I had no idea when. They were 6 minutes apart by then. I asked her when I should call her back, and she said I would know. Then I asked her when I could get into the tub. (If moms get in too early it could slow labor or stop it.) She advised me to get into the tub and put on relaxing music. We told our sons that we’d wake them in case their brother was born in the middle of the night. 8:40pm I began running the water. Before getting into the tub, a few drops of pink fluid went down my leg. I called my midwife back to tell her, and she said my cervix was changing and she’d be over within an hour, likely sooner. 8:50pm I settled into the tub with my Hypnobirthing CD and relaxed through the hugs as best I could. The water immersion was SUCH good pain relief and the Hypnobirthing affirmations and relaxation techniques were incredible. I was floating on blue mist and inhaling it too (Marie F. Mongan, Director of the HypnoBirthing Institute, says that with the aid of hypnosis, a woman can bring her body into a state of deep relaxation in which the body's muscles can work the way they're meant to during childbirth. She says it feels similar to daydreaming, or the feeling you get when you are lost in a book or movie. People who've used this technique report feeling relaxed, calm, aware, and in control.) The hugs in the water were 5 minutes apart and became stronger quickly. My husband called the children’s attendant, and she started on her way. My midwife was on her way, and her assistant was on her way too. 9:15pm She still wasn’t here, and I started having a feeling that I’d be pushing soon if the hugs kept up the way they did. I called her, and she said she was close by. I told my husband that I was going to have to push soon. He went to look for her car so he could keep our dog from barking, but first he asked me what her name was again. I said I didn't know! I was in laborland and completely forgot my midwife's name. Haha! I slowly breathed in through my nose and blew the intensity away out of my mouth, over and over again. 9:20pm I was focused and as relaxed as I could be through the intensity of each labor hug. Each one was more productive; no two were the same at this stage. I knew there was no turning back now; this was it. I changed positions from being on my knees in the tub to being on my side, supporting myself with my left arm. The water felt like a blanket making me feel safe and warm. I handed birthing over to my body and put total faith into what would happen. I had no idea how dilated I was because no one checked and told me, so I had faith that I was fully dilated and that my body was ready to push my baby out. I reached down to see what I could feel with my hand, and I felt his head bearing down. I thought to myself that I might tear and I should try to do what I could to prevent it, try to ease him out slowly, but my body was pushing really hard and it happened so fast that I barely had a chance to think. After two spontaneous pushes, his head came out. I felt his head to see which way he was facing. His nose and face were toward my back; he was occiput anterior which is an optimal birthing position. I knew that in one more push my baby would be born, and I that I faced the possibility that I would do it alone, and I was ready to do it alone. Just then, I looked up and saw Jon and my midwife walk into the bathroom. She said, “OH… Ok!” (very surprised to see a head out!) My husband later described that he felt “floored” when I asked him what he thought about that. He didn’t hear me yell or anything, because I didn’t. If there was one thing I knew going into this birth, it was that I did not want to be scared. I didn’t want to panic. I didn't want to lose control in “that” kind of way. This was quite different from my first two births, because they were in the hospital with pitocin and episiotomies. As soon as I saw my midwife, my eyes lit up and I said, “I did it! I did it all by myself!” with a huge smile on my face. She knelt down next to the tub and said she was sorry for not getting there sooner. I grabbed her hand and squeezed it, letting her know that I was elated and said, "Please do not feel bad." I looked at her and said, “Ok, one more right?” She said, “One more!” 9:36pm So my body pushed my baby out with the next hug and she caught him. She said, “Oh [silly boy] you’re all tangled up in your cord.” She unwrapped him and handed him to me. He cried a little bit and I talked to him and told him I was his mommy and how much we love him. He had the cord around him three times – once around his neck and twice around his body. Didn’t cause a bit of harm. While we waited for the cord to stop pulsating so that my baby would get every last bit of oxygen left from the placenta, my husband went to get the boys out of bed. They never fell asleep because it happened so fast, yet they were clueless as to what had just happened because I was quiet. They were sooo excited. My oldest was smiling ear to ear. My middle son's eyes got big and he said, “Me-Me” (which was "baby" in his toddler language) and he ran out of the bathroom to get his boy baby doll and proudly brought him back in, and he showed him off. Then he ran back out and got his baby doll’s stroller and sat him in it. We took some pictures while waiting for the placenta and talked about how exciting it all was, and how fast it happened. The midwife's assistant and our friend arrived while we waited. Everyone was apologetic for not coming on time. I really didn’t mind. It wasn't their fault! I was so happy to have made it that far by myself, and I was able to focus and trust completely that things would be ok. I said how I couldn't wait to do it again! They clamped and cut the cord when it was time, and took our newborn to check his vitals and weigh him and do his footprint certificate. He had a 9 out of 10 APGAR score. We didn't have to use the oxygen tank or my heating pad or anything. He was warm enough from the bath water and skin-to-skin contact with me. He weighed 7lbs 12oz and was 21.5” long, my biggest baby and fastest labor. They moved me out of the tub and into bed. The assistant went with the boys to make placenta trees on paper. She rubbed marker on it and did an impression on paper… the top was a round-like tree and the bottom was a thin trunk (the cord.) True art! We froze it until we were ready to plant it with a tree. My midwife checked to see if I tore, and I did a little one where I had the two episiotomies before. She said if I really take it easy and don’t sit on my feet and keep my legs together, it should heal on its own without sutures - it did. Our oldest son held his new brother for a while in the living room while I signed paperwork and received my postpartum instructions in bed. My husband put the boys into bed again and came back. They set me up with everything I needed and made sure we were stable, and everyone said goodbye and left. 12:30am My husband sent off an email announcement and brought me some more water, and I asked what he thought. He said, “Tonight was eerily perfect.” Well put. He fell asleep by 2am, but baby and I stayed up until 4am. 7:30am The baby awoke to see his big brothers. They wanted to hold him right away and were full of love. We all hung out on the couch for most of the morning until we had some visitors. Our baby was waterborn at home…naturally. We are blessed. Angela Bailey