"The more you stay curious, the more you grow and evolve, and that's going to bring you to your best self. So always stay curious."
-Simone Toomer
Episode 151, orgasmic birth® the podcast
Healing Birth and Birthing Autonomy with Doulas and Community Care
with Simone Toomer
Welcome to Episode 151
Ever felt like the system doesn’t believe you know your own body—or your own birth? You prepare, you research, you show up ready to advocate for yourself… only to face doubt, resistance, and voices that try to speak louder than your own. This episode dives deep into how you can reclaim your power, lean on community, and birth on your own terms—even when the world pushes back.
Simone Toomer is a birth and postpartum doula, International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, childbirth educator, sleep educator, and a fierce advocate for birthing autonomy. Drawing from her own experiences as a young Black mother navigating both hospital and home births, Simone brings raw honesty and lived wisdom to the conversation. Her work is rooted in community care, equity, and the belief that every birthing person has the right to be heard, supported, and fully informed.
Tune in to hear a candid, soul-stirring conversation about the sacred power of sister circles, the courage to challenge systemic barriers, and the beauty of birthing with confidence. Hit play now and discover what it means to heal in community, stay curious, and truly reclaim your body and birth.
Episode Highlights:
03:03 Simone’s First Pregnancy and Birth
06:38 Navigating Resistance and Preparing for Labor
10:02 Postpartum and Becoming a Duola
14:37 Simone’s Second Pregnancy and Birth
23:26 Postpartum Anxiety
26:15 Reclaiming Birth and the Importance of Community
Quotable Quotes
“I didn’t see childbirth as pain, I didn’t really label it, because I didn’t know what to expect.”
—Simone Toomer
“We live in a society where we are unfortunately planted with insecurities from very early on in ways that we don’t even understand and see.”
—Simone Toomer
“For me, the biggest thing is not to embody someone else’s journey.”
—Simone Toomer
Connect with Simone
Simone Toomer is a birth and postpartum doula, International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC), childbirth educator, sleep educator, and passionate advocate for birthing autonomy and community care. Drawing from her own experiences as a young Black mother navigating both hospital and home births, Simone empowers families with knowledge, confidence, and compassionate support. Her work centers on equity, healing, and the belief that every birthing person deserves to feel seen, heard, and fully supported throughout their journey.
Lactation Support via Lake Norman Breastfeeding Solutions
Website: http://www.wisewombandoula.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisewombandoula/
More from Debra
Website: https://www.orgasmicbirth.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/orgasmicbirth
X: https://twitter.com/OrgasmicBirth
YouTube https://www.youtube.com/c/OrgasmicBirth1
Tik Tok https://www.tiktok.com/@orgasmicbirth
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/debra-pascali-bonaro-1093471
Become a doula!
Debra is teaching a DONA Postpartum Doula Training in September 2025 and a DONA Birth Doula Training in November 2025.
Both trainings will include 1 in-person day in Brooklyn, NY. Visit the links below to learn more and enroll.
Doula WOrkshop testimonials
what past particpants are saying...
“Every aspect of this course was packed with information, resources, demonstrations and relevant and relatable examples. …Having Debra as a teacher sets the bar really high. I am honored to be under her tutelage.”
– Deborah Richardson, LMT CD
“Debra is one of the most amazing educators I have ever worked with. And that was online. I can only imagine how transformative her in person workshops are.”
– Olivia Doherty
– Olivia Doherty
“It’s phenomenal, the amount of knowledge that is packed in those days, how much I feel empowered after the workshop as well as excited to make a difference, the amount of references that were given are unbelievable.”
– Noha Ghonem