Are you smiling and wondering if I mean in childbirth or as a part of your sexual life? I mean both – as childbirth is a part of our sexual life!
I know you can agree with the idea of conception being a part of our sexuality, but let’s see how opening to the connection and honoring the sacred sexuality of birth, can prepare you to experience orgasmic birth.
Many women don’t have a birth orgasm or birthgasm when they have an “orgasmic birth,” rather they experience an “orgasmic birth wave.” Riding waves of pleasure and experiencing their power.
Birth, like sex, can put us in a state of heightened sensory awareness, with increased sensations stopping and starting. Sarah Buckley writes in Ecstatic Birth: The Hormonal Blueprint of Labor “Such high levels (of beta-endorphins) help the laboring woman to transmute pain and enter the altered state of consciousness that characterizes an undisturbed birth.” One can enter this altered state and ride the waves of sensation, expanding into the pleasure and increasing sexual energy and the hormones consuming one’s being. Riding the wave creates a peaceful, total body sensation that lingers as energy is exchanged between you, your baby and your partner. Birthing in love is a state of filling your entire body and being with oxytocin, the love hormone, and surrendering to the power within.
When you have sex, do you appreciate foreplay? Do you ride the waves, expanding and contracting with sensations? This is what I call the orgasmic wave. Just like in sex, focusing too much on climax can take you out of the wave. So too with birth, if we allow ourselves to ride the waves of sensation, including pain and tightening yielding to feelings of softening, ripening and opening, then we can experience the waves in between (“a blissful sort of nothingness” as Asta describes above).
Tantra teaches that one’s ability to ride this wave is what allows the sexual energy to build up, intensifying orgasm and preparing us for release. Isn’t this how labor builds till the incredible release of your baby sliding from your body into your arms? I describe this moment as Orgasmic! The pleasure, the release, the joy of meeting your baby.
Intimacy and sexual experience are not solely about climax – the climax is part of an entire sphere of intimacy and ambiance that includes connection and comforts. In labor and birth, this is best achieved if accompanied by supportive and gentle communications, touch, and ambiance in line with our most primal instincts of safety, privacy, warmth, darkness and quiet.
Release yourself of the idea of climax as defining an orgasmic birth (although for a few blessed women this too is possible), prepare yourself to experience a safe, satisfying and pleasurable orgasmic birth – riding the waves of expansion, releasing and welcoming your baby into your arm with joy!
Share your definition of Orgasmic Birth with us and together let’s start a twitter party of Orgasmic Birth moments #OrgasmicBirth
Register Today for Orgasmic Birth’s Partner Online Childbirth Education Class.